The Twin Forces Inside Us All
Inside us is a force, a desire, a need, to be safe, to survive.
We also have a force, a desire, to progress, to achieve, to improve.
These two forces needn’t be in direct competition, but they often are. They tend to work on an unconscious level. The desire to survive is very strong, and resides in the brain stem, the oldest part of our brain, created in us when we were Cavemen, and works on an instinctive level.
As the human being takes longer to reach independence than any other animal, it’s imperative that we have a strong mechanism to survive. So this part of us creates feelings (imagine standing on the edge of a cliff) to keep us safe. It creates thoughts to stop us taking risks (“You’ll fail”, “I’m not good enough” It’s too difficult”) and put obstacles in the way (I don’t have the time, I don’t have the money).
And also, we have a desire to improve, to grow, to make improvements, to meet challenges. We thrive on learning, we get stale if we do the same thing over and over, we get stimulated by new opportunities and by extending and realising our potential.
Every time we are faced with a challenge, a problem, a new opportunity, these forces go into battle for supremacy of our mind and our decisions.
For example, Gym Vs Duvet time, stay in job Vs start your own business, diet Vs Dessert! Each decision has a bunch of reasons why you should do it, and a bunch of reasons why you should not. When your ‘Why Nots’ are stronger, more powerful, more persuasive, than your ‘Whys’ you don’t take the action, but when your ‘Why to’s’ are stronger than your ‘Why Nots’ you do take the action.
Unfortunately, this is rarely a conscious, rational, decision making process. We have all these negative ideas created by that survival mechanism which lead to negative feelings, and so we don’t do things ‘because it doesn’t feel right’. Victory to the forces of survival!
But there is a huge difference between surviving and living our lives to the full. Being the best we can be. All of us can be better. Living according to our values, not other people’s ideas. Being open and having loving relationships, moving our career forward, being comfortable in our own skin. Looking for new challenges, contributing to our society, being positive role models.
There is so much potential richness in our lives, if we just strengthen our desire to improve, to progress, not so we take reckless risks, but so we can confidently meet the challenges and seize the opportunities that life offers.
On the Outlook courses, participants invest in themselves and learn techniques that bring clarity, confidence and certainty and freedom.
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Reply #1 on : Fri February 18, 2011, 22:19:53
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